@PaperWash: I was bit by a radio active spider so now I wear a rubber suit, swing around like a monkey and use karate, you know, like a spider.
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@FatherWithTwins: Me: What do you want for breakfast? 4yo: Bagel Me: *makes it 4yo: Tricked you! I wanted toast Me: Nice trick. Now, eat your bagel
@Jake_Vig: Women never find it devilishly charming when I follow them into the lady's room. Thanks a lot, "Top Gun".