@RegularFred: I was braised by wild cannibals.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@TheCatWhisprer: You can tell a lot about a person based on what they use as a gender-neutral singular pronoun.
@GrantTanaka: I've been in Hawaii for a week & have learned that 99% of life's problems can be solved by throwing a coconut at it
@lamefactory: 911, what's your emergency? What do you mean you've been stabbed? People can't do that, that's illegal.
@whatmaddness: Friends with kids: what's the matter with you, why don't you have kids yet Also them: kill me my life is a bottomless pit of despair