@SufficientCharm: I was doing well on my diet until I got my period and had to eat four pieces of pizza, a block of cheese, two candy bars, and seven houses.
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@Try2StopME: Hockey is more enjoyable if you pretend they're fighting over the world's last Oreo.
@ObscureGent: My favorite act of vengeance is befriending your dad and convincing him that dread locks would look cool on him.
@Rollinintheseat: *spelling bee* "Your word is disaster." "Can you use it in a sentence?" "That outfit you're wearing looks like a natural disaster."
@JediGigi: *eats pizza out of box in bed *falls asleep *wakes up next to leftover pizza Voila! Breakfast in bed!