@BourbonLuv: I was drinking at the bar, so I took a bus home. That may not be a big deal to you, but I've never driven a bus before!
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@CakeThrottle: [Interview with a time traveller] "What's life like in the year 3000?" It's pretty much the same as 2015 but you can download a towel
@adult_keverage: Bought a 2nd cell phone to leave on the coffee table as a decoy when I go tweet in the bathroom.
@LurkAtHomeMom: Friend: OMG did u see the thing on the news about the sinister clowns? Me: *flashback to me watching the debate* yeah I think I saw that
@wickedsuga: When I get startled, I scream in a really deep voice instead of my normal one. Cause if I'm going to be freaked out, you should be too.