@mina_baileyy: I was in a serious relationship once. We never even smiled.
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@aneesa_p: <--- 30 year old female who STILL snickers when the elevator door opens & the electronic voice says "going down". Never gets old.
@therealeatwood: ME: Haha you can tell them any name and they have to say it BARISTA: I have a latte for “A Person Who Deserves Love”? ME [crying]: Hahaha
@brianbowman73: Female Coworker: I just got this implant in my arm. It's for birth control. Me: I didn't even know an arm could get pregnant.
@OfficialMizGin: Guy in the club: *lifts up his shirt* I do 400 crunches a day. Me: How many more until you get a personality?