@Phoebetate: I was just accosted by a small child riding shotgun in a shopping cart yelling "why you ain't got no babies?"I bet my father in law paid her
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@michael_raphone: there's two types of people inthe world: cops who are a week from retirement and robbers who want to go straight but have to do one last job
@patnspankme: People who have to keep a phone charger in the bathroom; have you heard of shredded wheat and raisin bran?
@fro_vo: Guy in Car: get out of my way idiot Guy in Crosswalk: pedestrians have the right of way Car Guy: this ain't Pedestria buddy this is America