@HousewifeOfHell: I was really getting my act together--eating right, exercising regularly, looking hot, feeling strong, and doing good work. Then I woke up.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@AndrewNadeau0: BEAR JESUS: *Emerges from cave after 3 days* EVERYONE ELSE: This… this is not as impressive.
@Brianhopecomedy: I have keys on my keychain from the houses I used to live in just in case I'm hungry and in the area.
@: the first line of “wake me up when september ends” says that “summer has come and passed” which means that it‘s at least september 22nd so while people think billy joe armstrong is sleeping the whole month he is actually sleeping for at most 8 days cop arresting me: i don’t care