@Kirangandhi: I was so depressed dat my ATM displayed someone else's balance to cheer me up
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@ericsshadow: Doctor: How long have you been in pain? Women: It started at 7:45am on Monday while I was at work Men: Sometime between yesterday and 1997
@Sarcasticsapien: I ran into a woman as I walked around a corner causing her to drop a pile of papers and we didn’t immediately fall in love as we picked them up so now I’ll never trust movies again.
@Darlainky: Me: Hey Google Home. GH: You can call me Google. Me: *batting my lashes* My, you certainly do move fast.
@prodigis: whenever a song says put your hands in the air i do it on the spot. i have fun and also an alarming vehicle collision record