@mishakey: I was tailgating a slow driver earlier. He brake checked, flipped me off, and when that didn't work he turned his police lights on. Jerk.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@senderblock23: No, I said I wanted to BING you on my kitchen counter. You know, the popular search engine?
@WilliamAder: Every year on Valentine's Day, I put a smile on my wife's face by taking down the Christmas tree.
@CornOnTheGoblin: you're suing Gatorade because you mixed red and yellow and it didn't taste like orange? me: not even a little bit your honor
@david8hughes: [family game night] Me: do u understand now, grandma? U understand the rules now? Mum [tappin my shoulder]: she gets it. Loosen the headlock