@eddiesteadyno: I wasn't dropped as a baby, but I've been making up for it ever since.
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@LeagueofNope: No thanks, people who hum to themselves. I've seen enough horror movies to know that you probably just killed someone or you're possessed.
@DarzieDAMN: That artsy picture you took of your Jack Daniels really spoke to me. It said "This persons an alcoholic but still takes decent pictures."
@Reverend_Scott: Have you decided on dinner? "Yes, I'll have the chicken, grilled." Very good. *hears waiter yelling at chicken* WHERE WERE YOU LAST TUESDAY
@Home_Halfway: I spent 2 hours at a gym looking angry with my arms crossed. The manager thought I worked there and gave me a raise