@Thedudish: I wasted 400 years of my life trying to figure out if I was a vampire.
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@Smooheed: Standing behind a hot guy on a treadmill saying 'don't worry baby, I'll catch you if you fall' makes him run for a really really long time
@xysist: Sex is great, yes but have you ever had water come out of your ear after it stayed there two days after swimming? OMG