@MikeyHill_: I wear a cape because I'm Super Broke
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@Mikecanrant: *puts baby marshmallows on a porcupine* There you go little guy. Now you're bouncy.
@jwoodham: Dear Diary: Day 41 at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry. So far none of the other students have noticed that my wand is a Slim Jim.
@jake_likes_naps: The year is 2543. Beyblades are a form of currency. Everyone speaks in emoji. President Woof outlaws all cats. Madonna releases a new single