@xLiserx: I wear a French maid's outfit specifically to get OUT of doing housework.
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@shot_of_cabo: I realized she might be too young when I asked her the time.. And she said.. "The big hand is on the...."
@Mr_Kapowski: Hispanic magician: "I will disappear on the count of three. Ready? Uno, dos" *poof* And just like that he vanished without a tres
@junejuly12: Shout out to the person who had the balls to open the first no kids allowed restaurant