@Wuttercuerk: I wear Lacoste shirts with the little crocodile on them because when shit goes down I want crocodiles to know that I'm on their side.
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@drunkNnaughty: I have CDO. It's like OCD, but the letters are in alphabetical order. Like they should be.
@KyleMcDowell86: [Bowling Alley] "I'm sorry sir, but we don't have any bowling shoes left" *gestures towards a happy family of centipedes bowling*
@krissywillbretz: Brain: stop eating! Me: why B: you'll get fat M: so? B: there's only enough vodka to catch a buzz on an empty stomach! M: oh *stops eating*