@salmarch79: I went around the block with my bike for the first time in years and now I understand why Lance Armstrong took performance enhancing drugs.
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@EndhooS: [Last supper] Jesus: Same time next week guys? *they all nod* Judas: I'll book a table for 12 Jesus: you mean 13 Judas: yeah..13, I meant 13
@withanewname: [looking at pics] Where's that? -Hawaii Where's that? -Jamaica Daddy where was I? -You weren't born Why's the folder called 'Good Ole Days'?
@bgirl314: 5: Mommy can we pee in the pool? M: NO! Neighbors kid: Why? M: Because pee mixed with chlorine produces sharks and they'll eat and kill you.