@2tickytacky: I went into a store with my kid and came out with a different one by accident. This one is a keeper. He says he does brake work. Well see.
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@Everette: iPhone 8 is like your ex coming back after a year saying they changed, you give them another a chance and realize they're basically the same
@TheMichaelRock: My wife sent me to the store to buy shampoo, conditioner, lotion and condoms. I'm pretty sure the cashier thinks I'm making a girlfriend.
@Midgetspar: If someone ever asks you for advice just reply with "Buy a penguin". Imagine a scenario where that isn't awesome.
@Jake_Vig: Is it just me, or are fewer and fewer mustachioed cads tying women to the train tracks these days?