@FunnyMojoJojo: I went to bed last night and my brother came out of the closet and scared the shit out of me, I forgot we were playing hide and seek...
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@Ideal_Victoria: Watching my coworkers split a cupcake three ways was more upsetting than the first time I missed my period.
@EBenita0517: You didn't question the free nachos or the ride in the van. But now that I've got a knife to your throat you're all "why, why?"
@jonnysun: JESUS: hey check this oute [turns my water into wine] ME: woa!! thanks jesus JESUS: [grabs wine out of my hands] NO!! THIS IS MY BLOOD NOW