@StinkyGr33n: I went to the bathroom and forgot my phone. Had to read the little paper about Toxic Shock Syndrome from the tampon box again
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@CornOnTheGoblin: "do you have any pets" [remembers girls like sensitive guys] a cat "what's his name" [remembers girls also like tough guys] missile launcher
@TragicAllyHere: [I see a bug outside] Nature is marvelous [I see a bug inside] This must be the deliverer of my death
@Laser_Cat: [sermon] There will come a day when Christ will drive out evil from our land, and it will be the Judgment Day! *T-1000 shifts nervously*
@MK_Shenanigans: I forgot FB was not Twitter & posted something ultra dirty. Now I have to avoid my granndma, change my hair color & leave the state.