@freedom2726: I whispered to the wind, and the wind told me to shut up.
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@Michabean: Careful...I've already had our entire fight in my head and it doesn't end well for you.
@dshack8: "I know she told me to buy Tampax, but I'll buy the store brand that's on sale instead." The last thoughts of a man who's about to die.
@vlowgoes: My garden has produced some sick beets, some smashing pumpkins and some red hot chili peppers. We go on tour in the fall.
@ZachXJ: Little kid next to me on a plane just ate the preservative packet out of his jerky, looked at me and said, "Don't tell my mom."