@lovemydogduck: I will be tweeting telepathically today. So if you think of something funny, that was me.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@TheTweetOfGod: I planted all the evidence for evolution once it became clear it did not serve the best interest of My reputation to take credit for you.
@RogueGod: After two divorces, I think I've found the key to a successful marriage. Don't marry a c**t.
@HatfieldAnne: Shouting “wahoo” instead of “woo-hoo” so everyone in this bar knows that I'm into fun AND sport fishing.