@That_Damn_Duck: “I will cook for you.” I threatened
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@_missmoll414: My mother has been called for jury duty. The woman sits on her deck w/a BB gun shooting at deer for eating her flowers. Buckle up defendants
@matt___nelson: [interrogation] Where were you last night? "Out killing people" Louder for the tape [leans in] "The Cheesecake Factory, that's where I was"
@Tmoney68: FYI - They won't let you just pick a kid to take with you from the Lost & Found at Toys R Us. You actually have to be the parent.