@Storminika: I win arguments with cab drivers by getting out of the cab and leaving the door open.
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@Michael1979: OMG, just found my childhood diary! I was an adorable and strangely prescient little boy.
@BatmanOffDuty: *buying a dog* Is this a good dog? "Oh yeah, very good dog." Do any tricks? "No, I'm clean, selling dogs now."
@click4amanda: Officer: "Do you know why I'm standing here?" Me: "You got all C's in High School?"