@jessokfine: I wipe my counters with raw chicken breasts because I refuse to have weak children.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Darlainky: Nice try little pine tree air freshener, but this gas station restroom needs the efforts of an entire forest.
@tastefactory: COP:Do u know how fast u were going ME: The posted speed limit, 495 COP: Sir that's the route number, i don't even know how I caught up to u
@TheTweetOfGod: Earth was the first world I created. It has all kinds of problems. #firstworldproblems