@juliussharpe: I wish Bond movies gave a more realistic view of his jet lag and traveler's diarrhea.
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@Contwixt: "My water-bowl wasn't filled to its usual level so I stole your watch and peed in your shoes." --Cats
@david8hughes: "I've an appointment with Dr Patel." "Dr Patel is off sick today so-" [slowly backs away & whispers] "U people can't even help yourselves."