@beeftweets: I wish corn would teach other foods how to explode into a different food that's 10 times better.
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@JennyJohnsonHi5: Mayonnaise is cum. When you put it on a sandwich, you're spreading cum on your bread. When you ask for it on a burger, you ordered cum.
@SimplyNamedTron: How to dress like Lady Gaga: 1. Go to ikea. 2. Pick a object that doesn't belong on your head. 3. Put it on your head.