@NYC_Blonde: I wish I was a baby so I could pass out in public with a bottle and no one would look twice.
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@stockejock: Fool me once shame on you, Unless you're speaking Spanish, then that's eleven times and I probably deserved it.
@ChaseMit: My girlfriend's car got stolen today, so if you see a man driving a dark green Honda Civic, PLEASE tell him I left some Skittles in there.
@ArfMeasures: T-REX *runs past me* ME: woah more like tyrannosaurush T-REX *stops dead* ok you first. I'm gonna eat you first