@markydoodoo: I wish I was born in a year ending in zero so it'd be easier to remember how old I am. Thanks for following.
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@AristotlesNZ: Wife: How's the baby? Me: He keeps trying to shove socks thru the mail slot. Wife: Aw. His socks or yours? Me: Socks is the neighbor's cat..
@_shellzbellzzz_: My oldest played with BPA free toys that I sterilized constantly. My youngest is playing with a metal coat hanger and a AA battery.
@carinahsieh: imagine a rom com so perfect they never end up together and just stay enemies with sexual tension until they both die
@c_always_wright: high school was the free trial version of college. “if you wish to continue your education you can buy the complete pack for $50,000”