@shariv67: I wish my refrigerator would quit opening my bedroom door, staring at me, sighing and walking away.
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@Mikecanrant: Aardvarks aare so aanoying. Aalmost everything theyre aasociated with is aanoying. I get Aangry just thinking aabout them. Aalso Aarons.
@minafisheyes: Facebook sent me a notification....unfortunately, my meth lab on Farmville blew up.
@KeetPotato: [my dog lays down on my date's lap instead of mine] date: "i had a good time tonight" me: "i think you need to leave"