@gingerfaced: I wish snacks could talk so they could verify my whereabouts from 1 am to 3 am this morning.
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@Schmoodles: Someone at work asked if I'd listened to any good books lately, and now I've got a body to dispose of. :(
@usermcuserface: Calm down hipsters who clear your throats while pronouncing hummus. You bought it at Whole Foods, not a bazaar in Marrakech.