@gingerfaced: I wish snacks could talk so they could verify my whereabouts from 1 am to 3 am this morning.
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@BobWhite1975: 8- Dad, why is there oxygen on earth, but not on any other planet? M- Are you sure you just don't want to know where baby's come from?
@Brampersandon_: GIRL: Dad, I want you to meet my boyfriend DAD: Your bf is a bald eagle? BALD EAGLE: *adjusting toupee* I'm just a regular eagle actually
@XplodingUnicorn: 5-year-old: My teacher said this project needs adult supervision. Me: OK, what do you need me to do? 5-year-old: Go find Mom.