@mattgallo123: I wish they'd just come up with a smoke detector that stops beeping when I yell "alright!".
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@yayraptor: [dad training] TRAINER: im hungry ME: ok lets ea- TRAINER: [stares] ME: i mean-hey hungry im dad
@Darlainky: I hate getting cut off because I've "had enough." Who are they to say how much butter I need on my movie theater popcorn?
@awescar: *rips finished page from adult coloring book* *puts it on daughter's toy kitchen fridge*