@bridger_w: I wonder how smart I'd be if my brain were as good at remembering anything as it is at remembering every humiliating thing I've ever done
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@Carbosly: When I leave a plane, I tighten the belts before I leave so that whoever sits there next will think "wow, whoever sat here was very thin".
@QwertyJones3: [Sci fi movie] How did you travel such a distance so fast? "I went through a wormhole." Worms in the audience: Omg this is so unrealistic.