@chris_isloi: I wonder if anyone ever told Hitler "just be yourself".
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@jimmytorosian: A lawyer walks into a bar. A lawyer leaves the bar. A lawyer walks into the bar. A lawyer fails the bar because he was drunk.
@markydoodoo: Birthdays were invented by big wax corporations to sell more candles with numbers on them.
@IAmMikeFeeney: "Excellent choice, sir. And what temperature would you like me to microwave your steak to?" - The Honest Applebees Server