@IAmKatieOrr: I wonder if both Wright Brothers were behind their inventions, or it was just one & their mother yelling "Wilbur, you include your brother!"
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@Contwixt: If you tell me your kid is 22 months and I buy it a beer, that's on you. That is your bad.
@TheSharona06: For people who say "nothing is impossible", that's crazy. I've been successfully doing nothing for several years now.
@joejwest: COP: You seen an escaped evil octopus? ME: No COP: [looks up] Nice chandelier ME: Thanks COP: Why is it wet? ME: Um COP: And holding 8 guns?
@Brianhopecomedy: My 2 year old has a pretty big attitude considering that I'm the only one who can open the fridge.