@TheMichaelRock: I wonder if Morgan Freeman talks himself to sleep every night.
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@withanewname: The family pet is getting old so we're all pitching in and throwing the dog poop in the neighbors yard when she can't make it over there.
@aveuaskew: The only cat like reflex I possess is turning and staring at the wall when you talk to me.
@iGreenMonk: "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned." The priest replied, "I know. I saw your tweet!"