@MableGertrude: I wonder if the earth ever looks at the 2016 election and thinks about hurling itself into the sun.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@novicefather: Bro. It's not ladies man, it's ladies' man. Chicks dig a dude who can navigate a plural possessive.
@mattwhitlockPM: Sometimes I spend whole meetings wondering how they got the big meeting table through the door.
@bakedbrotatoes: -This is my son Michelangelo. -Oh, like the artist. -Um no like the Ninja Turtle.