@ThRealBallsDeep: I wonder if the guy I'm interviewing knows this isn't for a cologne model position.
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@shutupmikeginn: I like watching documentaries about murderers because i know i'm doing better than every person in the movie.
@Tmoney68: Today, I saw a sign outside a dental office that said "We do our business in your mouth" and I haven't stopped laughing.
@panmidwest: [Walk into a Cat Cafe] Me-I've never eaten cat. What do you recommend? Lady-They're for adopting not eating M-Oh, well can I adopt one? L-No