@WilliamAder: I wonder if the Three Wise Men said to Jesus, "Just to be clear, these gifts are for your birthday AND Christmas."
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@INDlAN_: *lost in China* Friend: ask that man where we are Me [pretending to speak Chinese with a local]: xian chan sēn F: well? Me: we’re in China
@flashember: [Doctor's Office] Sir, it appears you have takes-everything-literally disease. "Is it bad, doc?" Yes, but bear in mind- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
@Beatweek: Obama has been endorsed by Warren Buffett, Colin Powell, Mark Zuckerberg and Bill Gates. Romney has been endorsed by Lindsay Lohan.
@Treememories: Why do the models on the catwalks always look so angry? I would have been very happy to get paid to just walk around in fancy clothes.