@POOPSCRUFFIN4U: I wonder what song The Little Mermaid was singing when she viciously ripped a clam in half to make that cute bikini top
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@peachesanscream: Women who say getting married was the best day of their life have obviously never had 2 Kitkats fall out of a vending machine by mistake.
@DeadLioness: Getting murdered would be scary, but not as scary as if the forensic guy with the white chalk would trace my body fatter than I really was
@jjlob7: I don't need a personal trainer as much as I need someone to follow me around and slap unhealthy food out of my hands. :/