@LoriLuvsShoes: I wonder what Twitter employees do at work to waste time
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Reverend_Scott: [running away from killer] KILLER: YOU'RE GONNA TRIP ON YOUR SHOELACES THEN I'LL GET U ME: MY SHOES ARE VELCRO KILLER: NOOOOOOOOOOOO
@UNTRESOR: The average time it takes for an elderly woman to get her ringing cellphone out of her purse is 11 days.
@kelkulus: The Indian version of "How I Met Your Mother"is just a single episode called "I Met Her At Our Wedding".
@QwertyJones3: [outpost in the Arctic Circle] "I'm quitting, here's my 2 week notice" BOSS: The days last 6 months here "Sonofa..."