@LoriLuvsShoes: I wonder what Twitter employees do at work to waste time
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@eeethanford: Son have I told you about the birds & the bees? Dad you're an ornithologist & moms an entomologist it's literally all you guys talk about
@gwatts77: Me: Can I order the conch fritters please? Waitress: The "ch" is pronounced like a "k" Me: Okay Bick.
@LurkAtHomeMom: *checks WebMD* Holy crap, I need an ambulance! *checks insurance deductible* Nevermind, I'll just take a vitamin or something.