@shawnspree: I would fake a heart attack but this coworker would just try to finish his story in the ambulance ride to the hospital.
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@huntigula: ME: 3 Big Macs please. lol it's my cheat day CLERK: you ordered the same thing yesterday ME:[leans in] why don't u mind your own gd business
@TheAlexNevil: Read a magazine at the doctor's office so I'm all caught up on Clinton running for president. I don't think Bush can beat him.
@Fred_Delicious: [Jumps into taxi] "FOLLOW..." [taxi driver turns around excitedly] "...ME ON TWITTER" [Jumps out & moonwalks into Olive garden]