@shariv67: I would not advise turning your frown upside down. The surgery is extremely painful and not covered by most insurance.
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@duumb: journalist: is it true that youre attracted to inanimate objects? me: [lips on mic] that is a false allegation [lips get closer to mic]
@notbedelia: If you play Titanic backwards it's about a guy who rises from the sea, bangs a ginger and tries to throw her over the railing of a boat.
@TheCiscoKidder: Whenever somebody asks me what my hobby is, there is a long uncomfortable pause and then I back away until I can't see them anymore.