@JimmerThatisAll: I would organize my thoughts but I'm afraid they would form a union and demand benefits.
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@bfrosty04: Sometimes when I'm sad, I'll go to the park and, from a distance, look thru my thumb and index finger and begin squishing people's heads...
@sweet_toof: Go see American Sniper. Or go to your buddy's house and watch him play Call of Duty for two hours
@CelebrityChez: Just realized after two years that my boss is actually a grapefruit covered in ramen noodles with peanut eyes. Still very afraid of him.