@_Water_Baby: I would rather see my husband with another woman in his arms than a hammer in his hand.
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@holyscum: boss: r u flexible this week me: i used 2 be able 2 do a split in 4th grade i mean i could try but idk if there's enough space in ur office
@crushingbort: "Yesterday you were 3 Chainz and now it's 5 Chainz," Janet cried. "Where does it stop?" 8 Chainz frowned. "14 Chainz doesn't have time for
@TheTweetOfGod: Ray Rice. Michael Vick. And now Adrian Peterson. Congratulations, NFL. Your woman/children/animal abuse trifecta is officially complete.