@trevso_electric: I would rather weave a suit out of my grandfather's pubic hair than "pull an all-nighter" with you.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@okayestgoalie76: Me: "Siri, find me the nearest Starbucks" Siri: "the addiction hotline is..." Me: "no, I said...." Siri: "Oh, I heard you!"
@sip_at_home_mom: Finally cleaned out the fridge to make meal planning easier. Tonight, we're having buttered olives with mustard and baking soda.
@AimeeHelene1: Kid behind me on plane kicking my chair and coloring. *turns around* *grabs one of his crayons* *slowly breaks it* *whispers "you're next"*
@RxitWounds: OPEN UP THIS IS THE COPS What's the magic word? [Cut to them back at the station writing on a chalkboard with dozens of words crossed off]