@LuvPug: I yelled "STOP EATING CAT TURDS OR IT WILL HURT WHEN YOU POOP!" & my dog stopped eating, so if you need a motivational speaker contact me
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@TheBoydP: "Why put a baseball bat up when you can just lay it down on a stair in the middle of the stairway? What could go wrong?" ~My son apparently
@Matt_The_1st: Yes. You rt'd me 14 times in a row. Thanks. You are first in line for my liver when the time comes.
@natedog2049: Serial killers start their day by eating breakfast at McDonalds. Let me rephrase. They arent serial killers until they order & have to wait.
@stephenjmolloy: <enter password> ikilledaman <password must contain a number> *7 hours later* ikilled2men