@shhrugg: Ice skating is like walking in cursive
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@Book_Krazy: OUR KID WAS SOAKING WET WHEN YOU BROUGHT HIM HOME FROM SCHOOL! Me: [water pouring from backseat] Listen, this car pool thing was your idea
@Rollinintheseat: If a British person calls 911 and says, "It's a bloody mess" how does the operator know if there's blood or the person is just being British
@ceejoyner: Our boss just banned overly specific nicknames and the whole office is staring at Rat Snitch Brian The Good Time Ruiner.