@shhrugg: Ice skating is like walking in cursive
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@Mr_Kapowski: If you're ever lost in the woods, try to find a bear to kill. Their claws will provide four sweet breakfast pastries.
@Vodkantots: Cop: Do you know how fast you were going, ma'am? Me: I left my pills in my other bag & I'm about to get REALLY chatty. C: You're free to go.