@rorynotroy: id be so offended if a group of ppl just rolled through my room on safari rn as im lounging in bed and just pointed at me and took pictures
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@Ophelia_808: I'm starting to think the guy offering to check for lumps inside his van was not as legit as his cardboard certificate claimed.
@XLToast: No son, you can't go out with your friends. Tonight we're installing Windows Updates, as a family.
@Donna_McCoy: "Just gonna take a little off the top" I whisper, scooping all the icing from your cake with my fork.
@djr_102: There's an epidemic in Britain that makes vulnerable young women inexplicably attracted to douchebags who miss leg day.