@marebytes: I'd have more respect for the weather man if he just got on camera & said "I have no idea, your guess is as good as mine -go outside & look"
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@handsock_butts: Me: I didn't get anything this year. Do you think Santa's magic...is running out? Wife: Santa isn't real Me: Don't lie to save my feelings
@UNTRESOR: The average time it takes for an elderly woman to get her ringing cellphone out of her purse is 11 days.
@NYC_Blonde: If I ever get a dog I'm going to teach him how to fetch useful things like tv remotes, iPhones and men who like red wine.