@richforri: "I'd kill you if I thought I could get away with it".......things that were said to me during my divorce. Hey guy's, she's available!
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@wesjohnson8: "What am I supposed to do with this speeding ticket?" Officer, "Keep it, when you collect four of them, you get a bicycle."
@TheRobCee: Dog The Bounty Hunter's greatest weakness is getting distracted when the fugitive throws a tennis ball.
@3sunzzz: So it turns out that you can't use Cool Whip as shaving cream, apparently. Narrator: Ursula needed 3 stitches in an undisclosed location.
@LeslieInMpls: I wonder if clouds ever look down on us and say "Hey look...that one is shaped like an idiot".