@13spencer: I'd like to think that my exes see me as "the one who got away," but it's probably more like "the one who got away from the police."
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@DirtyySouthMess: I was singing in the gym shower & the girl in the one beside me started singing along & then suddenly my life became this weird, naked duet.
@Book_Krazy: ME: I'd like to order...the updog. WAITER: How would u like that prepared? ME: um medium well? W: very good Me: oh god what have I just done
@Reverend_Scott: And on the 8th day, God created atheists and said, "Oh man, you're not gonna believe this."